Counterfeit Patience

(excerpts from Desperate Dependency by J. Kirk & Melanie D. Lewis)

Too often patience is obviously missing during the holiday hustle and bustle. But you don't have to be lacking patience!

In Galatians 5:22–23 (NLT) God assures us, “The Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control” if we “follow the Spirit’s leading in every part of our lives” (Gal. 5:25 NLT). The fruit of the Spirit encompasses the distinctiveness of God. No human plantation can create a vineyard such as His. God is the divine husbandman. He plants the vine and prunes it precisely to produce the fruit He wants. This fruit completes His portrait so the watching world can see a glimpse of Christ through our lives.

In this current series of blog posts we are assessing the fruit God wishes to produce through His Spirit. But in our desire for independence we attempt to counterfeit God’s fruit with our own design. Desiring all He has for us but not willing to give all we are to Him, we endeavor to circumvent His plan by producing our fruit of the flesh. Our miserable efforts culminate in disastrous results: emptiness, futility, turmoil, and frustration to name a few. Obtaining an education as a fruit inspector will prepare us to distinguish between the authentic fruit of the Spirit and the counterfeit fruit of the flesh.

Patience > Control > Frustration
Patience is the fruit of the Holy Spirit that enables us to persevere under pressure. Patience maintains the virtues of love, joy, and peace when faced with the pressures of wrong, mistreatment, or taxation. When pressed, patience does not retaliate but rather addresses the underlying motivations of the soul. By His fruit of patience, the Holy Spirit moves us to look to Jesus for strength, giving the ability to forbear in circumstances that would otherwise deplete our resolve.

“Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others” (Col. 3:12–13 NLT).

The clothes we are to put on are tailor-made to fit our lives by the Spirit. Dressed in His power we are divinely enabled to accomplish the task He asks us to undertake. We cannot create our own style of patience; instead we are to put on His personally designed and custom-fitted attire. The royal garments of the King identify our position of servitude apart from personal ambition. We exhibit patience because He empowers us to do so, not because we have created it ourselves for our purpose.

When we attempt to counterfeit the Holy Spirit’s line of designer clothing, our wardrobe quickly fills with costumes of control. With masks of all shapes and sizes we create the illusion that we are in control and are capable of controlling all that is around us. But inevitably life is a process of losing control. Even though our patience is so often taxed and love, joy, and peace seem unattainable, we still choose to strategically control all aspects of our lives. We believe we can have patience when our expectations are being met. Therefore, the desire of the controlling heart is to guarantee a favorable outcome, maintaining self-interest, pleasure, and comfort through manipulation and exploitation of people, positions, and possessions.

Control must not be stereotyped as mean, hateful, angry, or limited to an aspect of gender, age, or population group. Control may be a little old grandmother who is terrified of one of her grandchildren getting hurt, so she seeks to use guilt, shame, and fear to limit their activities. Control may be an abusive husband who threatens to harm the wife if she tells anyone about the abuse. Control may be a rebellious teenager who climbs out the window at night to rendezvous with his choice of defiant activities. Control may be seen in homes, businesses, or even pulpits. If we are not living by the power of God, we are most certainly seeking to supply our own control.

Even though we try to control what we are incapable of controlling, we continue striving only to end in frustration. When we can’t get what we want and want more than we have, the dissatisfaction motivates temper tantrums. After all, “I deserve what I want”; “I should be able to have what I want”; “You should give me what I want.” Our self-centered world will inevitably come crashing down.

Solomon admonished, “Patience of spirit is better than haughtiness of spirit” (Eccles. 7:8 NASB). Therefore, Paul advised, “Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love. Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace” (Eph. 4:2–3 NLT). The ability to accomplish this mission only comes through patience supplied by the fruit of the Spirit when we let go of our control and its resulting frustration. If you find yourself experiencing the symptom of frustration, consider what means of control you are employing to counterfeit God’s fruit of patience.

Consider:
What have I been trying to control?
What were the results?