I Want What I Want

The familiar story of Jonah illustrates the approaches employed to address the deeper problem of the nature of sin. God was seeking to save a people while salvaging a prophet. Resistance and self-sufficiency jumped to the forefront as fear, evidenced by anger, gripped Jonah’s heart at the thought that God would not judge the wicked Ninevites. Jonah’s strategy to resolve the crisis was to ensure that God would destroy the people of Nineveh. Believing he could thwart God’s plan by refusing to participate, Jonah asserted his willfulness to create his own redemptive process. Unwilling to trust God, Jonah allowed his bitterness to fester and employed his own creative solutions. The story ends with God in the process of salvaging Jonah by showing him he has no ability to independently restore control to his life, because God’s plan will prevail.

BIBLE TRUTH
“Those who worship false gods
      turn their backs on all God’s mercies" (Jonah 2:8 NLT).

HOW DOES THIS APPLY TO ME?
Our exhausted supply of resources leaves us alienated. Loneliness invades as our thwarted efforts become evident. The emptiness of our hearts tempts us to continue the vicious cycle of seeking God-substitutes to fill the void. With continued resolve we contrive another plan of employing people, positions, and possessions for our power to live. Eventually the futility of the endeavor becomes evident through social rejection, compromised health, and a lack of personal energy to pursue the pathological dream. Alienated souls now stand stranded beside the road they thought would take them to the place of completion.
“See, they are all foolish, worthless things.
      All your idols are as empty as the wind” (Isa. 41:29 NLT).

PRAYER
LORD, I am crying out to you in my great trouble. I know you will hear and answer me. I am sinking beneath the waves and the waters are closing over me. As my life is slipping away, I am reminded of you, for my salvation comes from you alone. Therefore, I will offer sacrifices to you with the songs of praise, and I will fulfill all my vows. (Jonah 2:1–9)


(excerpts from Desperate Dependency by J. Kirk & Melanie D. Lewis)


We would love for you to share in the COMMENTS the insights you have received on your journey.

Christ Is Relevant to Doubt

To believe or not to believe that is truly the question. Doubt has become a standard problem within the Christian community. Often it is said, by those coming for spiritual guidance, "I am doubting my salvation," "I am doubting God's will for my life," and/or "I doubt if God can love me." Certainly doubt is a heavy burden upon those who bear under its load.

The Christian can have times of uncertainty that lead to anxiety because they do not understand how Christ is relevant to their particular situation. However, what is generally regarded as doubt is something different. Doubt, as is referred to here in its pathological form, is not typically remedied by truth, so it is a condition of the soul's unhealthy state. Doubt is created to avoid confronting the reality that we are abiding in unbelief. Doubt then is a defense mechanism that defends us from having to confess our state of unbelief and therefore protects us from our personal responsibility to believe. This defense then allows us to continue in the fleshly controls afforded by unbelief. Hence, doubt is blatantly condemned in Scripture.

6 But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind.
7 For that man ought not to expect that he will receive anything from the Lord,
8 being a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. (James 1:6-8 NASB)

The NLT translates the word doubt as "divided loyalty."

6 But when you ask him, be sure that your faith is in God alone. Do not waver, for a person with divided loyalty is as unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind. 7 Such people should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. 8 Their loyalty is divided between God and the world, and they are unstable in everything they do. (James 1:6-8 NLT)

“Divided loyalty” of the heart speaks even more specifically to the issue of a toxic soul. We may say, "I can't believe" when in fact it is that I am choosing not to believe. When it comes down to it, doubt is based in not being willing to give our souls fully to God due to wanting to reserve some part of the flesh for self. Therefore, no matter what changes within our situation, we are prone to perceive the changes in accordance with unbelief and the desire to maintain control. When we cover unbelief with doubt, we will always color the circumstances with the hues of unbelief. The only truth that will release us from bondage is to confess to God our actual choice to not believe Him in regards to our plight.

“No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money." (Matt. 6:24 ESV)

We may have a vast knowledge of the Bible, but if this knowledge has never changed us it is because we do not believe what we know to be true. When we believe, we act on what we know is certain. “Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see” (Heb. 11:1 NLT). It does not require complete comprehension. Absolute understanding is not a necessity. What is essential is that we trust and follow in God’s way. “You will hear a word spoken behind you, saying, ‘This is the correct way, walk in it,’ whether you are heading to the right or the left” (Isa. 30:21 NLT).

Our inability to trust reveals that we do not believe God at His word. It is imperative that we acknowledge and confess our unbelief. Authentically facing the reality that we do not believe God results in the trauma of truth that challenges our value system. When we acknowledge our inadequacy, genuine concern for ourselves motivates us to seek God for help.

“Unless your faith is firm,
      I cannot make you stand firm” (Isa. 7:9 NLT).

Insight Journal
Are you willing to convert what you refer to as “doubt” and repent of your sin of unbelief?
Are you willing to forsake your unbelief to embrace the truth by believing?

(Selected excerpts from Desperate Dependency by J. Kirk & Melanie D. Lewis.)

Which God Will You Choose?

(excerpts from Desperate Dependency by J. Kirk & Melanie D. Lewis)

Those who choose to receive God’s truth and enter into Christ’s redemptive process will move to repentance. Repentance is that place where we turn from our philosophy of self-centeredness to Christ-centeredness. It is opting to live and do life God’s way and giving up our self-sufficiency.

Those who continue in deception may attempt a ritual of repentance. With no true heart change, they may go through the motions commonly deemed consistent with repentance such as crying, revealing sinfulness, asking for forgiveness, going to the altar, making promises to be different, or even a renewed religious fervor. But these actions are merely playing “good” as these individuals attempt to feign something they do not possess. They are not actually seeking to be free from the domination of sin, but merely free from the consequences of their sin.

Deceptive individuals hope to project the virtue of godly change while remaining in their philosophy of self-centeredness. Through an elaborate ruse they attempt to regain power and control so they can once again manipulate trust to exploit others. But as we give up our willfulness to God and relinquish ourselves unreservedly to Christ, submission to God’s authority, obedience to God’s design, and death to our selfish desires will result.

      “Yet they act so pious!
They come to the Temple every day
      and seem delighted to learn all about me.
They act like a righteous nation
      that would never abandon the laws of its God.
They ask me to take action on their behalf,
      pretending they want to be near me.
‘We have fasted before you!’ they say.
      ‘Why aren’t you impressed?
We have been very hard on ourselves,
      and you don’t even notice it!’
“I will tell you why!” I respond.
      “It’s because you are fasting to please yourselves. . . .
You humble yourselves
      by going through the motions of penance,
bowing your heads
      like reeds bending in the wind.
You dress in burlap
      and cover yourselves with ashes.
Is this what you call fasting?
      Do you really think this will please the LORD?” (Isa. 58:2–3, 5 NLT)

Often evil pretends to be good. When our profession of faith is not congruent with our possession of Christ, sin gets normalized through deceptive rationalizations. The expression of evil is then disguised in the charade of goodness. Evil may present itself with a demeanor of goodness to the point we wonder, How could such a good person do this? Then we must look deeper at the possibility that the alleged goodness is merely a facade to disguise evil.

“Make sure that the light you think you have is not actually darkness” (Luke 11:35 NLT).

“And if the light you think you have is actually darkness, how deep that darkness is!” (Matt. 6:23 NLT).

Some may lead others to believe that their basic heart is good with only random aspects of sinfulness so that their unhealthiness is promptly dismissed as soon as convenient and their evil becomes normalized. After all, we are all going to make mistakes, right?

“Don’t scheme against each other. Stop your love of telling lies that you swear are the truth. I hate all these things, says the LORD” (Zech. 8:17 NLT).

The LORD spoke to Jeremiah about the pretense of Israel. God knows the ache we feel when individuals only pretend to be sorry.

During the reign of King Josiah, the LORD said to me, “Have you seen what fickle Israel has done? Like a wife who commits adultery, Israel has worshiped other gods on every hill and under every green tree. I thought, ‘After she has done all this, she will return to me.’ But she did not return, and her faithless sister Judah saw this. She saw that I divorced faithless Israel because of her adultery. But that treacherous sister Judah had no fear, and now she, too, has left me and given herself to prostitution. Israel treated it all so lightly—she thought nothing of committing adultery by worshiping idols made of wood and stone. So now the land has been polluted. But despite all this, her faithless sister Judah has never sincerely returned to me. She has only pretended to be sorry. I, the LORD, have spoken!” (Jer. 3:6-10 NLT)

Do you really want what God wants, or do you just say you want what God wants?